Post Whores II

[MadMaxx61]

[Sheila the tank is stuck on a rock while the turret is spinning in circles]
Sheila: Now that you've mastered driving the M808V, let's move on to some of the safety features.
Caboose: No! No, wait! Go back! Why are there six pedals if there are only four directions?

 

[ripmf666]

:bunny:

 

[MadMaxx61]

Simmons: Do you ever wonder why we're here?
Grif: One of life's great mysteries isn't it? Why are we here? I mean, are we the product of some cosmic coincidence? Or is there really a God, watching everything. You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don't know man, but it keeps me up at night.
Simmons: What? I mean why are we out here, in this canyon.
Grif: Uh... Oh... Yeah...
Simmons: What's all this stuff about God?
Grif: Uh... um... Nothing.

 

[ripmf666]

:banging::seesaw:

 

[MadMaxx61]

Caboose: I should've known. She didn't like me. Girls... never... like me.
Tucker: Caboose, I don't think anybody likes you.
Caboose: I like me.

 

[MadMaxx61]

Church: So how are you doing Caboose? Are you following any of this whatsoever?
Caboose: I think so. That guy Tex is really a robot... and you're his boyfriend. So that makes you... a gay robot.
Church: ...Yeah. That's right. I'm a gay robot.

 

[ripmf666]

:coal:

 

[ripmf666]

:mike::ralph:

 

[MadMaxx61]

[the Blue Team is talking about its tank]
Tucker: You know what? Forget what I said before. We can *definitely* pick up chicks in this thing. Probably two or three chicks apiece.
Church: Oh man, listen to you. What are you going to do with two chicks?
Tucker: Church, women are like Voltron. The more you can hook up, the better it gets.

 

[MadMaxx61]

the Blue Team is talking about its tank]
Church: You know what? I could blow up the whole goddamn world with this thing.

 

[ripmf666]

:taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz::taz:

 

[ripmf666]

ant:

 

[MadMaxx61]

Donut: And that's how I rescued you, and saved the day! The end! Any questions?
Grif: Donut, that was the longest story I have heard in my LIFE. And I don't think I believed a word of it!
Sarge: And quite frankly, I found the show tune in the middle to be a little over-the-top.
Donut: Every word is 100% true! It was the best military operation you two ever slept through!
Grif: Well, if everything went so well, where's our jeep?
Donut: I have a song I'd like to sing about that!
Grif: NEVER MIND

 

[ripmf666]

:spank:

 

[ripmf666]

:Charger:

 

[ripmf666]

:mail2:

 

[MadMaxx61]

Tucker: Ooo-kay. Church... is trying to get a TRANSLATOR. So that WE can TALK to EACH OTHER.
Church: Tucker, the enormous alien doesn't speak our language. Speaking slowly is not gonna help.
Tucker: What? I'm talking to Caboose.
Church: Oh.
Caboose: [camera pans to reveal Caboose] I don't understand. Are-are-are you hungry? Tucker, are you hungry? Are you cold?
Tucker: What? No.
Caboose: Do you need a blanket? Tucker, do you want some hot dogs and a blanket?
Tucker: Damn it, no, Caboose, I'm NOT cold, I don't want a hot dog, and if you put mustard in my ****ing sheets again, I'm gonna kill you.

 

[ripmf666]

:nuestroforo_bdias:

 

[MadMaxx61]

Church: Is this why you guys came home so fast?
Caboose: No, we came home because the alien died, and because the uh, glowing sword turned out to be a, uh glowing key.
Church: Yeah, a glowing key that could still STAB people.
Caboose: Right.
Church: So it is a sword. It just happens to function like a key in very specific situations.
Caboose: Or it's a key all the time, and when you stick it in people, it unlocks their death.
Church: Goddamn, man, I would love to live in your world for about ten minutes.
Caboose: Yeah. I have a really good time!
Church: [laughing] Yeah, it seems like it. You know, I don't think I'd get anything done, but I probably wouldn't care that much.

 

[ripmf666]

:treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed::treed: