*******Update*****
I was asked by another member for a update, so I thought I would just update this thread for everyone. I will touch on everything and then post in more details when I have more time and answer any question anyone might have. Via PMs or on here. Your experiences will very every state has its own adoption laws.
Jr. was born in Sept. and the birthmother did go through with the adoption. In fact we did just finalize the adoption on Fri. 61/2 months after he was born. We couldn't be happier.
My take on adoption. It sucks plain and simple it sucks a lot, but worth every second of it. First you have to get over the fact you are going to have several people analyze your families' and your life to get something any teenager can make in the backseat of a car. Hopefully you have a very supportive family like us in your choice to adopt, because sometime they ain't. You have classes to take on parenting and what to expect from adoption. You have back ground checks and home studies to do. You have to put together your "shopping list". Do you want an infant or teenager, race, sex, possible mental health issues(birthmothers drug use), in state or international? Our adoption agency was very supportive and we where comfortable with them. This is key its a stressful process and your emotions are going to be pushed. Then you make a book that is given out to expecting birthmothers. It will be your life story and how your going to "sell" yourself to the birthmother. We agonized over making it second guessing what we should and shouldn't put. You have to decide what level of contact you are conferable with having with the birthmother after birth. Yes after birth they will want to see that "their" child is being well taken care of and happy. Just like any of us want for our children. The birthmother can back out at any point (according to state law) and your out any financial support you have given her. You want her taken care of while she is carrying your child IE rent, food, care for other children, and ETC. Afterbirth hopefully everything goes well and your child goes home with you and then your starting the down hill side. In our case all we had to is not do something stupid and get him taken away from us. The adoption agency is responsible for the child for 6 months until Finalization. In those 6 months you will have a few home visits, reports for the agency, and meetings with the agency. Painless for the most part.