Opinions on kids

[othrgrl]

My wife and I talk about this all the time. We know quite a few people who have "accidents" at a young age and have a tough time but do all they can for their kids. That is somewhat understandable. But then we have other friends that are immature, do nothing but party, live paycheck to paycheck, etc and they are trying to have kids. That makes no sense to me. Then there are the people that are having relationship problems and think kids will fix it - that makes even less sense.

I grew up in a split family with both sets of parents struggling to make ends meet - we never had much, were eligible for free lunches in school, etc. I started working at 9 to save up for a car, but also started to buy my own clothes, shoes, etc not long after. I was still happy growing up, that doesn't take money. My wife on the other hand grew up 1 of 7 kids in a loving home that had plenty and they lived comfortably.

My wife and I are expecting our first around New Years, we waited until we had been married a few years, vacationed in places we had both always wanted to, I had my toys (DD truck, Race truck in progress, and a motorcycle), bought a house in a great neighborhood big enough to comfortably raise a family, had a good amount in savings, and both had stable jobs that individually make enough to support a family of 3 comfortably. I can't wait for him to get here and although I know you don't need money to be happy it's so nice to not have to worry about making ends meet.

 

[x MadMAX DIESEL]

I know how you feel, its like having a kid is the new cool thing to do?!

 

[madmatt]

My wife and I talk about this all the time. We know quite a few people who have "accidents" at a young age and have a tough time but do all they can for their kids. That is somewhat understandable. But then we have other friends that are immature, do nothing but party, live paycheck to paycheck, etc and they are trying to have kids. That makes no sense to me. Then there are the people that are having relationship problems and think kids will fix it - that makes even less sense.

I grew up in a split family with both sets of parents struggling to make ends meet - we never had much, were eligible for free lunches in school, etc. I started working at 9 to save up for a car, but also started to buy my own clothes, shoes, etc not long after. I was still happy growing up, that doesn't take money. My wife on the other hand grew up 1 of 7 kids in a loving home that had plenty and they lived comfortably.

My wife and I are expecting our first around New Years, we waited until we had been married a few years, vacationed in places we had both always wanted to, I had my toys (DD truck, Race truck in progress, and a motorcycle), bought a house in a great neighborhood big enough to comfortably raise a family, had a good amount in savings, and both had stable jobs that individually make enough to support a family of 3 comfortably. I can't wait for him to get here and although I know you don't need money to be happy it's so nice to not have to worry about making ends meet.

congrats on the soon to be new addition. It's a tough adjustment at first but man it's amazing. I bail on things i never thought i would have just to hang with that guy.

 

[madmatt]

taking this chance as a proud poppa to plug in a pic of my boy lol,,,,,,

 

[jrkrace]

All good posts...Seems that a balance of age and money are the key factors. I started when I was 32 and after 3 kids, I think it was a good age. Enough to be stable financially and young enough to enjoy them.

The real shock for new parents is finding out what kid's stuff actually cost...

Financial stability flies right out the window...

 

[crazycrew]

The real shock for new parents is finding out what kid's stuff actually cost...

Financial stability flies right out the window...

SO TRUE!!! Try buying diapers for 2. Thank GOD that's over with:woott:


PROUD parent here also!! Here's my two little demons

 

[madmatt]

All good posts...Seems that a balance of age and money are the key factors. I started when I was 32 and after 3 kids, I think it was a good age. Enough to be stable financially and young enough to enjoy them.

The real shock for new parents is finding out what kid's stuff actually cost...

Financial stability flies right out the window...

no shit,, our little boy had reflux and was on a prevacid solutab once a day. well since it was tier 3 or whatever my insurance didn't cover it. $200 a month out of pocket on top of all the other stuff. don't sound like much but with special formula, diapers and all that it adds up quick. That said anyone can afford it if you put your mind to it and make it happen but it was a shock when it wasn't covered and cost so much

 

[Tank222]

I'm 25 and my wife is pushing for a kid. I keep saying that I want a bunch of money in the bank before we do, but I think with my life style i'll never save money unless I have to.

 

[madmatt]

exactly,, it'll always be something and you'll never be fully prepared,,, just do it and redivert your funds to the baby. It's worth it trust me.

 

[Josh2002cc]

I hope you never reproduce :cool2:

 

[custom8726]

In Short I think BALANCE is key, Money, maturity, stabilty, etc,etc.. In my case my parents divorced when I was 3, my sister and me stayed with my mom and grew up , Well Poor I never wanted my kids to grow up bouncing from school to school with no stabilty, money or deprieved of opportunities in life. My wife and I have been together for 15 years already and married for 5, we have 2 kids, a 3 year old boy and a 2 month old girl. My wife is a school teacher and is in her 8th year teaching full time. Now to the point She grew up in a divorced, but stable house, only lived in that one house and attended one (District) school untill college and was not deprieved of much. She has wanted kids for atleast 10 of the 15 years we have been together. I Always had a plan since I was a teenager and stuck to it.I said I would not get married untill I owned my own house and was sure (As one can be) it was going to be for good. I also decided I was not having kids untill I was 30 and not only financially secure but also mature enough to handle it. So now at 33 and my wife at 30 with 2 healthy kids running around and both of us in our career jobs, I think I made the right decision in waiting. Dont get me wrong A small part of me wishes I had my kids younger simply because they are the most important thing in my life and also the best thing I have ever done in my life but without the "Balance" of all the other factors Above I dont believe I could have been as good of a parent as I feel I am today....

 

[Dozerboy]

We waited until we thought we where ready to have kids. That was 4 years ago and we are now poorer then ever. 4 years of fertility and now we have moved on to adoption. We would of been a lot better off if we weren't responsible and had them years ago. We are fairly young too.

 

[dmaxdaddy]

If you wait for the perfect time to have children, you may never have any. Of course you shouldn't have 8 to 10 kids if you don't have a full time job. These are extreme cases. ( but they do happen!) Children require sacrifice from their parents. I had my first child when I was 21. I was definately nervous about the unknown at the time. He will be 16 next week. I have a 14 and 12 year old also. Without a doubt being a father (and husband) is the most rewarding thing I have ever done. I woundn't change anything about it. If you want to be a parent and are willing to work as hard as you can for your family you should do it. If you are worried about what you will have to give up, you might want to put more thought into it. One thing is certain - you will never believe how much you spend on diapers and Enfamil. Also, alot of good looking kids on this post. That's what it is all about! :thumb:

 

[workin' diesel]

I am 30 with 2 kids and number three on the way. While I think that geting yourself stable is a good idea, be carefull. I always see people that wait to be financially stable and nver make it so to speak. My sister in law and her husband are 5 years younger than me and say they cannot afford kids. He owns a business, she teaches at a college and is going for her doctorate. Sounds bad, but they currently make enough money to support 4 mortgages!!! We make enough to support one and live quite comfortably. So trying to decide when you are finacially ready might have more to do with a good home, a good job, good insurance and most importantly being with someone you love and has the same similar goals in life.

 

[bullfrogjohnson]

We waited until we thought we where ready to have kids. That was 4 years ago and we are now poorer then ever. 4 years of fertility and now we have moved on to adoption. We would of been a lot better off if we weren't responsible and had them years ago. We are fairly young too.

My heart goes out to you and your wife. I can only imagine the road yall have been down. I will keep your family in my prayers:hug:

My wife and I decided to wait till we were financially and emotionaly mature enough for kids. I never made it to that point but my wife said she had enough for the both of us Im 26 and shes 28. We started trying almost two years ago. After a year of no luck we went to the doctor and found my wife had lady issues. They told us surgery would repair the issue. After the surgery the doctor told us it was not good and they had to remove my wifes tubes and the only way we could have kids was through IVF. None of it was covered by insurance and there are no guarantees with IVF. Well after months of weekly doctors apointments, daily shots (I had to give them to my wife and some of them were the size of horse tranquilizers), emotional ups and downs, and 15k later. The doctors told us we had one viable egg to transplant out of the 18 they had collected. My wife and I prayed and just put it in the Lords hands. My wife is now 4.5 months pregnant with a healthy baby boy!! I still have 4.5 months left of worrying until I can hold him. But I have faith that everything will be fine. I am glad we started trying when we did because it only gets harder the older you get. As long as you have a wife and marriage you cant live without and a mindset that your children are the most important thing in your life, I believe everything will work itself out. Just dont wait forever because you never know how hard it actually can be to have your own child.

 

[blk smoke lb7]

My heart goes out to you and your wife. I can only imagine the road yall have been down. I will keep your family in my prayers:hug:

My wife and I decided to wait till we were financially and emotionaly mature enough for kids. I never made it to that point but my wife said she had enough for the both of us Im 26 and shes 28. We started trying almost two years ago. After a year of no luck we went to the doctor and found my wife had lady issues. They told us surgery would repair the issue. After the surgery the doctor told us it was not good and they had to remove my wifes tubes and the only way we could have kids was through IVF. None of it was covered by insurance and there are no guarantees with IVF. Well after months of weekly doctors apointments, daily shots (I had to give them to my wife and some of them were the size of horse tranquilizers), emotional ups and downs, and 15k later. The doctors told us we had one viable egg to transplant out of the 18 they had collected. My wife and I prayed and just put it in the Lords hands. My wife is now 4.5 months pregnant with a healthy baby boy!! I still have 4.5 months left of worrying until I can hold him. But I have faith that everything will be fine. I am glad we started trying when we did because it only gets harder the older you get. As long as you have a wife and marriage you cant live without and a mindset that your children are the most important thing in your life, I believe everything will work itself out. Just dont wait forever because you never know how hard it actually can be to have your own child.

I really hope all is well and no complications having kids is awesome and i hope and pray i am not to late yet myself

 

[TheBac]

Kids are expensive, but the rewards outweigh the trials. As a parent, you have to sacrifice some of your own needs/wants to provide for your children, as they come first.

 

[DMAXchris]

31 with no kids here. About to get married after 9 years in 2012. Don't plan on having any for a least 3-4 more years at least. We need a bigger house/addition before even thinking about kids. Plus, we're too busy having fun to take on the responsibility.

I have plenty of friends that are miserable because they had them at a young age. They'll never admit it, but I can tell its not how they planned it.

 

[Dozerboy]

My heart goes out to you and your wife. I can only imagine the road yall have been down. I will keep your family in my prayers:hug:

Thanks and congradulations