Famous quotes

[messejme]

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

--Mariah Carey

 

[x MadMAX DIESEL]

:spit:

 

[jmaz268]

"Hold my beer....This is going to be good." ---Anyone of my family

Does that count??:happy2:

 

[mmangels22]

:rofl:

 

[06blackmax]

"Hold my beer....This is going to be good." ---Anyone of my family

The best stories I've ever heard always started "hey ya'll watch this" or "one night we's all sittin round drinkin and....."
Dont get any funnier than that. Actually I think these are famous last words. Sorry!!!!

 

[messejme]

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.."

--Al Gore, Vice President

 

[messejme]

"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,"

-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign

 

[SSgtRyder]

You never want to hear a sergeant say "watch this" or a second lieutenant say "in my experience"

 

[FullSpec]

"Just e-mail the product to the store honey..."

-My wife, half asleep

lol

 

[messejme]

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas ...

If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas ;

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas ;

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas ;

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas ;

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas ;

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas ;
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas ;

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas ;

If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas ;

If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas ..

 

[MadMooseEngineering]

From Dimitri this last weekend
"Nitrous is over rated"

If you know Dimitri you will find this funny!!!